Don’t get me wrong. When I wrote this little ethos (Because You’re Worth It), I meant every word. It’s a guideline to survive by. But so long as I’m writing about confessions, I confess that sometimes you just have to swallow your own tasty words with your tail between your legs. Realistically, it won’t always be followed to the letter and I knew this then. This isn’t Mean Girls where you get kicked out of the lunch table if you break a fashion rule. It’s impossible to perfectly keep up with a daily regime without developing or intensifying some form of neurosis. A cheer for all you women who make it seem effortless to be mascara’d and flawless every single day, rain or shine. But ‘fess up! There lies a midget psycho in you that tries to escape every day right? Don’t worry, the twitching eye will stop.
In my case, there still exists a pair of floppy sweatpants or two that need to be replaced. I’m sure Husband would appreciate more matching unmentionables. There’s been a bit of haircut and styling postponing. I ate gluten in a bowl.
But I do have good updates. Since putting it on paper (and by paper I mean a web page), it’s been a reinforcement and motivator to keep up with my own suggestions a lot better. I’ve been putting on my face more often. With the exception of yesterday’s man-scale exceeding the average, the Minimalist Look with a Morning Dew is becoming a quick and easy look. The Well-Rested concealer from Bare Minerals and nude-colored eyeshadow (two items I thought were irrelevant when I was a spring chicken) are as faithful as a BFF. When the really achy and slow awakenings don’t give me time to slap it on, I lug around my little 2nd chance bag for later. If I haven’t been able to keep up, I at least throw on the moisturizer and lip gloss.
One of my recently developed habits, on days that I look disastrous because of these difficult mornings that spite me and/or creeping age, is that I come home from work straight to shower, puff some foundation on my face and pretty-it-up, even if I’m just in sexy-house-sweatpants. I make-up for the ugly day I had. When I feel that I look better, I get more done and with more spunk. Yes, I have been known to put eyeliner on to do the dishes.
Writing it down, and most notably, sharing my Beauty Belief with everyone was just an extra push to live harder by it. It’s like Weight Watchers, when you have people expecting you not eat hamburgers every time you have an emotional crisis, you are further encouraged by your teammates to fight the call of dead meat and cholesterol! Even if you slip up once or twice. Even if you skip a week and the girls don’t really give mind to your every ingested meal, you know the universe knows and it will tell on you if you give up on your self-made values. Thankfully, they understand the downward spiral, but the gals get down because the power of the united cosmic fight requires more energy to be kept to standard for women all over the world. I’ve never been to Weight Watchers, but I imagine it’s something dramatic like this.
I’m even thinking of writing another guideline, this one about abstinence. Vows of Food Abstinence to be clear. Because it doesn’t matter how organic the half box of whole grain chocolate chip cookies that I ate were, they were still loaded with gluten (note that I’m gluten sensitive). I ended up with a guilty conscience, throbbing knees, and enough anxiety to become a Wall Street stockbroker in our economy. This area needs tidying up. It’s my livelihood we’re talking about here.
The point is, we all have a set of rules we should stick to that help up stay on the mark. Unless we have obsessive compulsive disorder, we end up breaking our rules to prevent from exploding estrogen all over the walls when things get tough and disheveled. And if there’s anything that I share to you worth a rat’s patootie (I’m saying patootie until I write a age-and sensitivity appropriate disclaimer for my site), is that you should write down the things that matter to you and inner-confidence and check yourself against it every once in a while. As silly as it sounds, sharing it with someone adds a seal of authenticity. Depending on the frequency in which you break your own rules, you’ll know how frazzled you really are and that you need to readjust your wacky chi.
So on a day that you didn’t forget pick up the dry-cleaning, are wearing your shirt inside out and backward (true story), ran out of cat food, burned dinner, gained 4 stress pounds, forgot to pay the light bill, and you find yourself eating a snickers bar in the middle of your living room staring at your great masterpiece, not caring…take a breather. Take out paper and pen and number of bullet a list of things that will help you either prevent or take care of yourself before things like this happen. Type it up and laminate it.*
But IF there is splippage, don’t beat yourself up. There is always the clause section. Not loophole section: clause section. And you can only have those amended if reviewed and approved by an official notary to prevent your sneaky alter-ego from changing your creed when momentary lapses occur. And they will. No matter what kind of sugar empowering high you’re on when you write the ethos.
Just keep checking against it to see how you’re keeping up by your own standards. No one else’s.
*No, I haven’t laminated mine. It’s typed neatly online.