Run.

For the first time in three years, I ran. Just now.  I’m still slightly dewy from the little baby sweat I broke.  I’ve slowly been incorporating a plank here, a push up there, a 5 pounder whenever it feels safe.  I went outside for a light walk for some wellness.  My knees and back have been sore and swollen from pushing through warning signs my body gave me during a strength training workout.  Nothing like a little circulation to ease the pain of inflammation.  In contrast to five years ago, where two minutes of walking was a sight for the sad deterioration of a young girl, my chi flows properly now and allows the healing of muscles and aches.  So, I thought I’d heal myself a bit.

Ten minutes in, without a proper sports bra, my running shorts, and while wearing dorky glasses, I didn’t give it a second thought and found myself moving quite fast and heavy.  It felt so good to put weight on my bones (I can’t lift heavy like I used to, but this seemed to be working).  It felt strange and so comfortable at the same time to have my heart beating fast while breathing steadily.  I felt my butt and hams and quads tight, my back strong.  Well, the shins and ankles were not what they were, but they accepted the challenge.  Carefully, at the first reminder of my old arthritic wounds, I receded back into a brisk walk and waited a few minutes between a jog.  But now I know that I’m back.  I could burst into a waterfall of tears right now.  Six months ago I was looking into disability and now, in less than 15 minutes I found the confidence to entertain the idea of running a 5k again, as I originally intended a few years ago before I was diagnosed with Lupus.

Thank you acupuncture.  Thank you Chinese Medicine.  Thank you God.

The body is marvelously made to heal itself.  When we stop taking medications that kill a symptom dead in its track without every consulting with the organ that stemmed the imbalance to begin with, and give it a fruit, vegetable, or herb that brings blood and life to our ailing body, we are capable of reversing the aging process.  My body still aged quite a bit with my illness and I’m sure it’ll always require mindful maintenance and consideration.  Mortality will still call me out if I don’t listen to my body and push too hard.  But it’s been very appreciative of the internal care I’ve spent blood and tears on.  Now I can sweat a little bit.

www.livingharmonytampa.com

This is the Healing Center that saved my life, in case you live near Tampa and deal with chronic anything, despite what doctors have told you.  I was skeptical too.

Image

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Filed under Picture of Health

Raw Brownie Rabbit Poops

Raw Brownie Bites

Raw Brownie Bites from Rabbit Food For My Bunny Teeth, click for link and blog.

Tried these at home during a sudden violent craving.  I was determined to stick to the diet and succeeded with this recipe. I had all the ingredients at home, and I sure wasn’t going to drive out and work for my satiation.  It had to be fulfilled in 10 mins or I would die.

I also had husband and cousin approval. They concurred the flavor was sweet, fudge-brownie-like, and nutty. I thought these were chocolate-y and naturally and so yummily greasy.

Raw Brownie Bites
Makes 12 servings

1 cup pitted Medjool dates
1/2 cup unsalted sunflower seeds
1/2 cup walnuts
3 Tbsp raw cacao powder (or 6 Tbsp cocoa powder)
1/2 tbsp pure vanilla extract

Blend the sunflower seeds and walnuts in a food processor or high powered blender until finely ground but not a nut butter consistency. Add the cacao powder and vanilla extract and blend again until mixed evenly. Remove pits from dates. Add the the dates and process until a dough like mixture is formed. You should be able to sculpt the dough without crumbling. Using a 1 Tbsp measuring spoon, scoop the dough and roll into 12 balls. Keep in the refrigerator for 1 week or freezer for up to 1 month. Enjoy!

Also, you can later turn them into this:

Aren’t they the cutest little rabbit turds you’ve ever wanted to pop in your mouth?

Brownie Batter Milkshake
serves1

2 Raw Brownie Bites
1 frozen banana
1 cup unsweetened almond milk (or milk of your choice)

Combine almond milk, banana, and 2 Raw Brownie Bites in a blender and blend until smooth.

I added greek yogurt for protein as a post workout meal.  So yum.

More updates on what I’m eating lately, and what I’ve discovered that is healing me so that I can occasionally stomach dairy and other foods again and pee like a normal human. I’m now a flexitarian, no longer vegan, but eating extremely clean, mostly gluten free, and working out again.  Did I mention my joints are working again? What? We’ve got some catching up to do.

UNTIL THEN, CHECK OUT THIS BLOG 

http://rabbitfoodformybunnyteeth.com/

Read her bio. Inspirational.  And her recipes are healthy and easy enough for a fifth grader to make.  She’s a keeper

3 Comments

August 29, 2012 · 7:20 PM

The Art of Self-Regulation (of a flibbertigibbet)

I go on these kicks.  I’m all about reading.  I’m all about gardening.  I’m all about makeup.  Oooh! Nail Art! One obsession at a time please, or it will result in my brain imploding or my back account taking off like Madoff. As one rabid concentrated episode takes over, all the other tiny buttons and levers on the dashboard of life start dwindling.  Balance, what’s that? Fader, I know that one.  It just …fades.

Here’s my current epiphany… that surely will not last:

  • Freshen up, fugs! I look ravishing in the mornings.  The trick is: keep your face on. It falls off as the day goes by.  I don’t freshen up compulsively like I used to when I first learned how to be a girl.  Lips dry off and flake.  Oils secrete.  Pores rage.  Wisps of hair fly away, every which way. Descending liner makes eyes look sad, tired, old. Or the whole scary trifecta. I’ve attempted carrying a moderate size toiletries bag with the essentials, but it quickly snowballs into a mom beach bag, with everything but my hair dryer.  I carry my regular purse around, plus a carry-on suited for a body bag, and maybe another one in case somehow it all doesn’t fit by the end of the day.  It soon begins to surface all the questionable behaviors that come with pack rats.  I need a make up zipper pouch-ish container, relative in size to my current handbag, with just the basics.  Gloss, translucent powder, floss, teeny deodorant, and a shiv.  Which I will lose anyway at some point.  And a timer set, in not-obvious intervals (so i don’t rise suspicions of incontinence), to prompt a ladies room break to fix the face that people have to look at.  Poor people.
  • Look into dry shampoo. Yes, hoisting my arms up over my head for 5 minutes plus everyday? I’m not keen on that.  If you are, you’re lying.  Plus, I don’t want a dry scalp that looks like a snowy White Christmas from city water overkill.  But, oily hair, ew. Disgusting.  Time to research and test products like a lab rat.
  • Breathe. Dammit, breathe.  I forget this.  Living in the city, and working with all men, it slowly pushes my buttons and steadily decreases the length of my breaths. Creeping up on me are short staccato gulps of air that confuses my body to thinking I’m anxious.  And I am.  And I’m one loose screw short of a breakdown.  I’ve been getting so comfortable in this panic, so sure that hyperventilating just means I’m alive.  Frankly, I need to start having less than one mid-life crises a month. It’s supposed to be one per lifetime. In the middle.  The plan: go home, practice my breathing yoga at least once a week. BEFORE I get zombie’d into watching Prison Break, if I know what’s good for me. And I usually know, but I just forget.  Come back to the middle.  I need oxygen in my muscles.  Or my muscles will conspire against me and make me look like a spaz.
  • Read more.  Which Nook has been helping, that along with other detrimental and disgusting habits like clicking your Google spending account like it’s morse code and surfing their book shop for hours, weaving around their -shockingly popular- smut (and oh my God do they have a lot), just to find a mediocre literary steal for $3.99 that you’ll never get around to unless you finish the complete work of Sherlock Holmes because it was only $1.99.  However, when I read more, I imagine more. I make brighter and stronger and funner connections.   I start getting interested in things, like when I used to take Adderrall to synthetically make the boring people more interesting.  Plots, stories, and visualizations are bread for my brain.  I like it.  It’s carbo loaded.  It’s sugar and spice and high in caloric content.
  • Meditate on personal goals.  Yes, I have to meditate on the things I value and appreciate and keep me in balance (diet, long distance friendship, clothes that fit), because otherwise I kind of just relax my gut, throw on a ratty t-shirt, and veg out with my —- out.  This directly relates with the first note of staying pretty during the day.  I need constant reminders to myself that the doughnuts make me feel ucky after I’ve inhaled it, the wine makes me narcoleptic, that corn is not as fun going out as going in.  That even if I feel woes and aches, I feel better if I take a walk instead of sleep it off.  Granted, there is a balance. With my precious hollow bones, I need to give in to repose a bit more than the average fitness buff. But for the most part, keep lifting apples, put down the cookies, and move my lumpy ass into a tight clench.  That may make no sense, but i wanted to use the word clench.
  • Sing more often.  Horrible as it may be for the miserable bystander,  I notice I do this when I’m relaxed.  Simply listening to music is not enough.  When I stop singing during the days, nothing but non-musical whines and complaints emanate from my rotten stinky core. My common excuse is that sometimes there are too many notes I can’t hit and too many lyrics to remember.   (Don’t you hate those people who can rap along to Eminem after hearing the song just once.  And they don’t even like him??? Cause who does, really?). If I’m not singing the same ol’ three stanzas of a song, I end up mad-libbing lyrics like Elton’s Johns, “Hold Me Closer, Tony Danza”.  Haha, just kidding.  I don’t ‘do’ Elton.  But call me a butcher cause that’s how I cut it.  Solutions:
      * Stress headache? Listen to Chinese meditation string-plucking, chi-aligning music.
      * Don’t know what to play? That’s why God invented shuffle.
      * Nothing will cheer me up? Hello!? You have the whole Britney Spears discography!
      * Desperate for a picker-upper that not even Brit-Brit can fix? Pop in the Annie DVD and fricking sing along with a broom.

    Rounding down to the point: don’t be too lazy to turn on my slow-loading iTunes library and wait for the processor to get rhythm into my head. I do not like myself when I don’t murmur along to songs, much less belt it out for the cats to witness.

    Author’s note: I still maintain a blood pact with the universe to never, EVER, willfully engage in karaoke. I don’t have to explain myself.  No I don’t.

  • Keep writing.  Keep journaling.  Keep getting rid of the excess junk in my head.  Use up the female word quotas of the day before they fall upon the days of hormonal psychosis once-a-month and all hell breaks loose…for my husband.  I’m fine with it.  Poor him.  Keep categorizing my thoughts, or at the least letting them free before they’re tangled in my head and I end up staring, open-mouthed, at things.  Just random things.  Even if I have nothing of value to share, a trivial fact I have gained in my absorption of vague book smarts, is that this is how women build oxitocin to regulate stress cortisol and make us deal with the male gender more readily.  Not oxicotin (whole other story).  We share, we communicate, we stay engaged in the things that matter: like keeping my face from melting during the day, morphing into an old uptight cat-lady who doesn’t crank it up, a deaf-mute who has not spoken in so long, she forgets how to exercise her vocal chords, and dry lizard skin.

To the readers: I’ve been thinking of you.  Sorry I was gone so long.  Sorry I promised I wouldn’t be gone so long.  I won’t make any more promises I can’t keep. So I can keep it together.  When I do write, it will be whole-hearted.  Miss you. Love you. Xoxo and other keyboard characters that express emotions.

🙂

XD

😛

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From the Couch of: Housewife

I tend to write only when I’m healthy and on a roll.  Making it a bit unrealistic for all the turd little symptoms I have to put up with.  So, here I am.  Couch Planted.  I made an executive decision to stay home and heal.  I put in a call to the doctor to clarify some of the side effects from my new Plaquenil.  It has its benefits, but as all medicines you are warned about nausea, headaches, muscle weakness, joint pain, depression,  sexual impotence, constipation, diarrhea, the very disease you have times 10, hysteria, schizophrenia, pooping your pants, Tourette’s syndrome, wearing mismatched clothing, kicking babies, channeling Woody Allen, and talking to walls.  I woke up something similar to a  migraine. I’ve been having vivid nightmares (thankfully, not hypnogogic dreams which I have regretfully experienced with certain muscle relaxers I no longer take). My muscles were moving strangely, joints were swollen, short of breath, frog in throat, and a few other uncomfortable numbers all at once.  Mostly my forearms, hips, and calves were in pain, hard to move, and that doesn’t even explain the existential sob fest, which I must say was very peaceable and gratifying, but none the less, not acceptable in a workplace with 50 men … and lil ol me.

I’m in incredibly good spirits.  Probably grateful that the universe forced me to take an off day.  I’m fighting the urge to go clean something because I actually have time!!! The need to rest is paramount, but its hard to stay still.  Especially, when whatever body part that wants to move gets sore from collecting stagnant blood at the site. Regardless, I aim to take it easy somehow. Thank you Netflix and audiobooks.

I have been violently nauseous.  Violently in comparison to someone who always is ready to eat, not someone who has been through chemo.  I believe I have not been eating and drinking enough water due to the nausea, or the medicine is just making my tummy acidic. I don’t know.  I don’t know how it works.  Before, the investigative journalist in me would come out and I would scour the earth’s library and internets to find out why and how, but instead I think I’m just gonna plop a DVD of Foster’s and fall asleep while drinking juice.

Link to site, Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends

I have a growing suspicion that while I was drinking nopal, my liver was cleansing out some of the harsh effects of the medicine.  My skin was not experience the side effects as strongly.  I did not get strange stabbing pains in say, my armpit or behind my ears.  I was doing it everyday until the chick at the produce stand stopped selling them prepped, spine-free, and I decided I had poked myself one too many times to keep doing it myself.  Also, my fingers get sore really fast with such detailed work.  However, I see it is something I will have to endure.  Or ask my mommy to do it.

Other possible side effects are sun sensitivity and cold/hot flashes.  I felt it they improved when I fist started the meds, but it’s back . It can easily just be recurring Lupus symptoms, or the setting in of generic medicines hating my body.

I’m not sharing this to enhance your day with useless facts you never needed to know about me.  (Fact 1: First place I sweat during cardio: my elbow. What? Fact 2: I don’t sweat anymore. I physically don’t sweat, I overheat like a baby.) I’m sharing mostly for those who have taken Plaquenil and have had different experiences. MTV’s Real Life: Lupus and Diet Related Stories. Mostly, I write to share ups and downs and know someone else out there might go through similar problems.  It sometimes feels like I’m the only 28 year old with these silly issues.  But I know that’s not the case.

Remember the No-No Mission. I feel responsible to tell you I am not holding up my end of the bargain.  That’s right. Today at 5, when Cappy’s opens up.  I’m surrendering all my faux-vegan claims and shamefully (but ecstatically), eating pizza.  I’m going down with my dignity in flames.  I will not overdo it, but I certainly plan on not reaching my goal.

Dignity Robbing Justifications:

1) Sick day, I ain’t cooking.  Feel fine now, but in 1/2 hour into scrubbing pans, I will curse the day!

2) Cannot take any trips to health food stores.  No energy and the sun and heat can make it worse.

3) I’m starving.

4) The nausea is making all foods, except Glowing Green Smoothie and apples, disgusting and my gut needs something to masticate.  I’m gonna be hungry this evening.

5) I’m out of gluten-free bread to whip up something quick at home (that won’t make me hurl).

6) I’m going insane dammit.

7) Husband is out of town AND I feel crappy.  I earned my pouting.

Like I’ve also mentioned before,  I don’t believe in moderation of certain foods.  But I also don’t believe I can go a whole lifetime without it. Apparently, not even 30 days.

Either way, I’m a pinwheel turn away from  morphing into psycho-midget…so I’m gonna pacify myself with some good ol American indulgent food.  And I’ll feel better. Then I may or may not feel worse (sometimes my body actually appreciates that I ate something hearty..justification). But I’ll quiet the battle of whether I will or won’t.

Or I may just have an avocado and beans bowl and not screw this up!  The world will never know.

If you’re still reading, you either a studying the psychology of hungry women… or you’re a Super Trooper.

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Filed under Loopy Lupus, Under the Weather

I Dairy Your Not To Eat This Pizza. (Or Make Bad Puns)

Cheese. Holy Cheese. Cheese and Rice. I want it.

My uterus just skipped a beat.

I certainly don’t need the added hormones, natural occurring and lab enhanced opiods, indigestible lactase, and cancer inciting casein.  But oh how I violently crave the gooey mess and sodium that no plant on earth can provide.  When I die, I hope it’s choking on an endless pizza cheese strand.

See, on the Beauty Detox diet and many similar reads, they warn against detoxing too fast.  Eliminating too many foods at once can starve the body and upset the natural order of addictions that had created part of our diseased homeostasis.  Add  one too many large green smoothies, no artificial sugars, no dairy, no gluten, no caffeine, no chemicals…although healthy, is too much for the body to handle at once and toxins can begin to recirculate in the system, not being eliminated fast enough.

Since I got my new toy, the omnipotent Blendtec,  I’ve been blending everything, not just my greens.  I had about a week of liquids.  Sticking to veganism is also easier since you can make anything creamy on my nifty high speed blender.  Oh, that double edged demon!

The result: the last week I’ve been a terrible little monster.  Mornings are headachy, dizzy, nauseous, I feel odd, feverish, twitchy, hot flashes, straight up menopausal, and I want to go around flicking people on the forehead and giving them wedgies.  Some people even get rashes, acne breakouts, minor infections, can’t poop, throw up, or become pyromaniacs.  This is somewhat of a good sign; it means it’s working, but it can be very intolerable.  On top of that I sometimes takes fungal detox pills (to help with lupus symptoms) and that starves the candida we all contain in our system, which feeds sugars.  I angered the beast by depriving it and it also releases toxins or some story like that.  I have not given my body time to adapt to the new detox principles.  I was mean to myself.

And then Kimberly Detox girl posts on her blog, The 25 Unhealthiest Junk Foods you should never eat. I have no problem with her logic. I believe what she says is true.  Some people believe in moderation.  I don’t.  If its bad, its bad for you no matter how clever your justifications are (which I’m a master of).  If I eat a cupcake, I chalk it down to human folly and weakness, not to “you deserve that treat”.  We don’t deserve DNA wrecking food agents. What I have a problem with is that she posts the most scrumptious pictures of foods that you’ve worked so hard to erase from your mind…and then tells you to go wash down a green smoothie and chew on fermented cabbage! Is she psychotic??? I’ve been muting commercials to forget pizza exists and reading nutrition labels to reason that a french fries should not have 14 ingredients.  Bypassing coupons and missing sales to shield my eyes from clips of burritos.  Seriously considering self-flagellation to mimick the suffering of giving up silky, creamy cheese.  What she does is barbaric! Tell it for what it is, sister.  Plants are nutritious and fuel our bodies, but don’t tell me a chemical laced cheesecake can stand up to kale kabobs….  I’m sorry Kimster.  So sorry.  I didn’t mean that.  I truly and honestly love eating clean and natural.  I’m just going to curl up in my big mac and cry, I mean big bed.

Well, I’ve slowed down on the liquids, adding more solids, especially the complex carbs.  I will sparingly add tiny pieces of meats every few days, once a day (believe it or not, with my weak stomach muscles, I feel it appreciates something to masticate, no matter how much I dislike the idea of eating flesh postmortem ).  I will include a bit of fructose until I’m ready to increase to a new level of health.  Otherwise, I may as well make a date with the judge, because I will go on a machine gun massacre in a playground.

Cheese stops you up! Greens make you goooo!

Spouting off has therapeutically talked me back down to terms with my decision to avoid dairy.  I just don’t do well with that junk.  My skin, my intestines, my energy levels, my unstable alter ego. I’m balancing the crazy by drinking some organic green tea which will appease my flare of ornery toxins, but prevent me from going down the mozzarella spiral.  It’s natural caffeine is a minor evil compared to going to town on cheese sticks, cheese fries, cheese cubes, cheese rounds, cheese soup.  You can’t fix the whole barn in one day. (Whoa. I am not sure where that farm comment came from).

Let me tell you the safe eats I made to prevent a melt down. (Ooh..cheese melt). It was so surprisingly good, it’s illegal.  Instant gratification, without deviating too far from clean foods).

Gluten Free and Vegan One Minute Chocolate Cake

What the what? Oh yes, it’s true. And I was shocked how well it worked. Tastes amazing with just the right amount of indulgence.  And since it’s one serving, you can’t accidentally overeat or take the rest of the huge store-bought devilish cake out of the garbage and pick out the untouched parts.  (I’ve never done that…..)

As I said, it doesn’t count as a cookie.  Though I’ve already admitted to you that I’m a master of justification, there is a reason that my No-No Mission (No Cookies, No Pizza) doesn’t involve all categories of sweets.  You’d have to ask my alter ego why (The Little Fat Girl inside of me). And she’s to hungry to talk right now.  But mostly, it’s because that pair are my gateway drugs.  Eating gluten free cake or a vegan milkshake will satisfy a craving. Period. Dunzo. The No-No’s will trigger an emotional history-soaked schizophrenia freak show of gluttony.  Pizza and cookies has been people all over the world to their demise!

I swear the government is involved and banking off of our addictions in plain sight! Just say no-no!

Aaaanyway, on to the recipe.

  • 1 tablespoon plus 2 tsp cocoa powder
  • 3 tablespoons spelt flour (or white, or even coconut or peanut flour) (I used brown rice flour)
  • 1/8 tsp salt
  • 2 tsp sugar (I used coconut sugar. Total of 8gms of sugars. 7 begins to affect the glycemic index and I drank some nopal blend before to control the spike)
  • 1/4 tsp baking powder
  • 1 stevia packet (or 1 more tablespoon sugar)
  • 1 tablespoon coconut oil or vegetable oil
  • 3 tablespoons milk of choice (I used almond milk)
  • 1/4 tsp pure vanilla extract
Directions:
Combine dry ingredients and mix very, very well. Add liquid, stir, then transfer to a little dish, ramekin, or even a coffee mug. Microwave 30-40 seconds. If you don’t want to eat it straight out of the dish, be sure to spray your dish first (and then wait for it to cool before trying to remove it).

For frosting I didn’t use her recipe.  Click Chocolate Covered Katie’s link if you want it. It was the same coconut butter base though.

I used coconut butter, stevia, and soaked cashews. Okay okay, I added some agave. Sue me and take me for all I’m worth. My defense attorney will go to show this only increases the number of cacti varieties I ate in one sitting and since when is eating cactus bad for you?

Coconut Cashew Frosting

  • 15 oz of Coconut Butter
  • 1/3 cup Full Fat Canned Coconut Milk – 14 oz
  • Coconut Milk (carton)
  • (Approx 1 Cup of Raw Cashews (soaked and rinsed well to remove toxins) (Kimberly disapproves of cashews)
  • Liquid Stevia
  • Agave (Optional)

Directions:

Blend in a high speed blender.  Feel it out to taste.  Simplistic directions.  I’m no kitchen expert.  

Yields:

About 20 oz. Enough for a regular cake.  Reduce portions for this tiny adorable cake and have some extra frosting dipped in strawberries.

Now excuse me, I’m going to go slurp on my green junk cause I’m actually craving some right about now…

Where is my sippy cup?

8 Comments

Filed under Foodsies, Housewifing, Indulgence, Loopy Lupus, Picture of Health

Push Start

What I’ve been up to:

  • Got my official lupus diagnosis.
  • Taking Plaquenil (I finally caved, despite my fear of medication). It works so far.  Very minor side effects. Every med does at first.
  • My usual rollercoaster (up and down energies and stamina).
  • I Pinterested maniacally, and probably illegally, for a while.
  • Over it.
  • Cooking. A lot.
  • Mostly healthy.  A few typical slip ups.
  • On a 30-Day No-No Mission.  No cookies. No Pizza.  Not even healthy versions.
  • Day 10. I have withdrawal headaches and I hate people.
  • Got a Blendtech.  Green Smoothie-ing the days away. (Thank you Mom and Naner.)
  • Feeling significantly better. The medicine has decreased just about every symptom. (No hip pain. Breathing better. No facial stiffness or pain. Less inflammation. Less bloating. Peeing normal. IC improved. Absorbing nutrients better. Memory and recall improvement. Less brain fog. etc.) Still have a long way to be a normal human, considering my hair doesn’t abandon my scalp on the second month. C’mon Plaq! Let’s do this.)
  • I can do a push up again. Sweet sweet push ups! (No cardio yet).
  • Blending more stuff! Soups, hummus, non-refried beans, smoothies, milkshakes, nut butters, the cats. Anything!
  • Been able to hang out and be more reliable than usual.
  • Got a super sexy haircut from sister-in-law to make my thinning hair (autoimmune symptom) look better and stronger. Started hair, skin, and nail vitamins.
  • Husband away on business a lot, but able to spend more time with him when he’s in town.  Cause I’m getting my bounce back.
  • Wore heels on Wednesday.  Got setback.

So here I am on the couch, ignoring the little piles of chaos, telekinetically demanding the living room fix itself and failing.  I overdid it this week.  But I’m content. So content the way things are going.  Feels like new beginnings. This medicine gives me just enough energy and freedom to make the meals I need to stay healthy and keep the cycle going.  Healthy food: more energy and detoxing.  It controls my stress and ease  mental awareness so that I don’t end up eating a cupcake every time I stress, which was not rare at all.  My house is neater.  Husband looks more relaxed.  Yes, the quality of life has improved and has potential to improve more if I keep on drinking my spinach every morning.  If the anti-malarial pill works (doctors don’t even know how exactly it works, go figure), I may even be able to get back out in the sun more, cause I’m gettin pasty.  I don’t even look Spanish anymore. Except my nose. Today I ache quite a bit as I mentioned, because of shoes.  If you’re a woman, you know this problem well.  My legs and muscles get all weird and don’t heal if the perfect storm of conditions doesn’t materialize for me to wear cute shoes for more than one hour.  I was rocking my hair cut and let my confidence get cocky. Gotta keep her in check.

I’ve been wanting to share all the awesome links and recipes I’ve been trying out but I’ve opted to use my recent health for activity.  Since I’m down for the night, I might as well spend my active rest giving you links to explore.  The recipes are gluten free and mostly vegan. They are so easy they verge on lazy.

Detox Breakfast Everyday: Glowing Green Smoothie

I follow her recipe to taste and add avocado for creaminess. I buy local, not necessarily organic. If husband drinks too, we add whatever fruit necessary to satisfy an American ADHD kid.

Protein bread!: Paleo Pumpkin Bread

Coconut butter, (cashews optional), coconut milk, agave, stevia, and vanilla make an mean frosting and voila: Cake!

Ditto: Pumpkin Banana Bread

I turned regular almonds into flour. Not blanched like she says. I'm cheap. And easy.

Creamy Comfort food: Roasted Butternut Squash Lime and Coconut 

Add a bit of curry and cinnamon.

Way to screw with Picky Eaters and Children:  South Beach Surprise Mashed Potatoes (I use almond milk and organic Earth Balance).

It's Cauliflower...Shhh!

Having about one a day, still losing weight: Cake Batter Milkshake  (No sprinkles for Bubble Girl).

I use refrigerated organic full fat coconut milk. I guess lite would work too. I'm not curious to find out.

Next Experiment…this one is first when my Cookie privileges are redeemed: Cookie Dough in a Bowl

(No visuals here.  Pictures may induce seizures… like a junkie whore).

My friend, also wedding photographer’s wife and now student of photography herself, has a spankin new blog.  I was supposed to share a while back, but I was hibernating:  Tired Yet Inspired

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Filed under Foodsies, Housewifing, Indulgence, Loopy Lupus, Picture of Health

How To’s on Buttery Indulgent Health Junk Food, not as contradictory as it sounds.

I believe in health food.  I also believe in sneaking in as much natural sweets and fats as the body can handle per day without overtaxing your liver, colon, and bloodstream.  However, most of the awesome recipes that catch my eyes include a bunch of ingredients that are hard to find or  have to be ordered from 3 different websites, in bulk, to really get a deal.

Today, I share my recent discoveries that would incite immediate salivation on anyone, while supplying tremendous nutrients.  I’m talking gluten-free, dairy-free, soy-free, nut-free*, allergy-free, anti-flammatory….guilt free basically.  Your body wants it. Your body needs it.

These are so easy and inexpensive to make its disgusting.

*Almond is actually a seed, not a nut. 

On the menu is:

Soft Serve Banana Ice Cream*, with Raw Fudge Sauce

Vanilla Almond Flax Butter

Key Lime Mousse

and the latest dangerous obsession where too-much-of-a-good-thing unfortunately applies….drumroll please…..

Coconut Butter

No, I’m not gonna teach you how to make them, silly! I’m going to share links.

All you need is a food processor, one of the best investments you can make.  Or a mother-in-law who has had an unused spanking new appliance for years in her closet waiting to be used.  I don’t know if blenders are as successful as a food processor, but the authors and/or comments on these links tend to discuss that issue.  A high speed blender is the next, pocket-denting, investment to spend on but that’s a story for another day.  I make by with a regular blender if I have to.

via sparkpeople.com

Soft Serve Banana Ice Cream*, with Raw Fudge Sauce. Or Coffee Flavored. or Peanut Butter Swirl.

Click here for instructions which is basically: frozen banana, process it, dunzo. 

Here’s a video, using coffee.  Coffee flavored banana ice cream? Brilliant! Cheerio!

This one is Kimberly’s Synder version with a fudge sauce.  She recommends organic bananas. Usually, I don’t buy organic bananas.  But in this case, if we’re willing to pay $4 for a starbucks coffee, let’s splurge on a homeade ice cream that hasn’t been gassed with pesticides, am I right? It will cost about the same as the coffee, and they taste better, sweeter, it’s alkalinizing, provides potassium, and it impresses people when you say I churned this ice cream just for you.  Still will be under $4.

Youtube the options, some add chopped walnuts, I would integrate some vanilla bean and/or organic peanut butter and make a swirly if I wasn’t intolerant.  If you can’t afford raw cacao powder, Hershey’s cocoa powder is better than the vein-blocking processed syrup.  The point is: drop the Chunky Monkey, and work for your body. For those allergic and intolerant, that’s why God created almond butter…segwaying into our next amazing treat:

via Healthful Pursuit

Vanilla Almond Flax Butter

Kill me now. This is amazing.  We all need more Omega 3, anti-inflammatory foods, for our little bellies to send out into the body, but who knew there was such a magical way to deliver it?  The best deal for roasted almond butter is at Costco for $5.99 on a humungo jar.  But a 3-lb bag of raw almonds is $9.99 and you could probably make 3-5 jars from your own, and this way you can monitor the heat used to roast the seeds so that you retain the most important fats and reduce the harmful ones.  Ground flax is also sold at Costco, but even Walmart carries it now.  If it gets hard to process, the recipe creator (a holistic nutritionist) recommends adding a few drops of almond oil to smooth the process.  Since, I’m trying to stick to a budget for now, I will be trying coconut oil, because you can’t add enough coconut to anything.

My little sauce recipe:

  • almond butter
  • a small amount of coconut milk
  • cinnamon
  • agave.

Agave is not recommended if you’re trying to clean up your body and provide nutrients, but every once in a while I do pig-out indulge.  Stevia is a healthier, more natural option.  The Husband loves this junk on a bagel.  Haven’t convinced him to go GF and probably never will, but I got him off most of the dairy.  Gold stars for him!

via healthyblenderrecipes.com

Key Lime Mousse

All hail this gluten-free vegan!  She looks like a princess.  She eats like a queen.  And simultaneously, a pig.  For voracious appetites who want a sleeker frame and plenty of sweets, this one is also painless to make. Tried and true, I recommend this for sweet tart lovers.  This is perfect for dieting and beautifying skin.  The sweetener on this is optional.  I just add an extra banana if I want it sweeter. And I go psycho on the zest.  I need the sour face to make me look pretty.

via superkitchenmachine.com

Coconut Butter

This is an obsession.  Probably worse than when I was 15 yrs old, obsessed with Nsync, in which I also wanted to spread them on toast. You know I’ve been practically threatening about the quality of your life if you do not try coconut butter.  At $7.99 a jar from Vitacost.com, it’s not too bad.  Use this link for $10 off.  Then Husband discovered it, and its an arms race to see who can scarf it down faster.  I will not spend $35 a month on butter.  Here is where the beauty lies…I found out how INEXPENSIVE and EASY it is to make at home.  Like all the previous recipes, you can get creative and add some cacao powder and natural sweeteners.

Recipe link:  They use a Thermomix.  I don’t know what that is.  But I’ve searched far and wide: you can use any blender, bullet, or processor.

How To Video link: Glad I found this one.  She has good tips, like not using sweetened coconut to avoid fails, and my personal secret: buying coconut flakes at the indian grocery store.  $2 for coconut.  $2! versus  $8.  That means I can eat it four times as much.

How To Make Your Own Coconut Butter: I just like this vid.  She prefers a blender over food processor! And said something about lemon truffles? What?

What and Why Coconut Butter?

So why is coconut good for you? Google it. I’m not doing all the work for you. But it has amazing health benefits.  Wait until I get into fermenting coconut water..soon.  Someday.  I’ll get there

Moderation is still important, obviously, blah blah blah, but I’ve found that eating healthy is easy when you’re surrounded by so many delicious recipes that are good for you to begin with.  If you only stick to the cookies and chocolate bars we’re used to seeing on ads, that’s what we’re gonna crave.  But if we learn a few options and get creative, it gets easier to get all our vitamins and minerals while eating something that only tastes sinful.

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Filed under Foodsies, Indulgence, Picture of Health