Tag Archives: cellulite

Goodbye, Sally Cellulite!

Here’s the post I’ve been promising about Sally Cellulite.  I’ve got to stop promising posts.  Short attention span.  Anyway, Cellulite: A woman’s nemesis.  This is a living testament how to get them legs and boo-tay from old lady hams to yoga sticks.

The reverse happened with me.  I got rid of them, and only then did I research how the heck I unintentionally came to love my legs.  I did not see this coming.  Actually, it was a frustrating point even at the height of my fitness days.  I would run 6 miles and kill it with the lunges.  I had rock hard quads, sculpted hams and firm thighs, but still puzzling was why after getting rid of so much fat in that are I still has cellulite with a personality of its own, not severe, but enough to NOT justify all the blood and sweat.  I wasn’t so much embarrassed by it as annoyed.  Even though I was constantly improving my body through exercise, I had already embraced all the flaws and the part of ourselves women always find to loathe and criticize.  What really put my panties in a bunch was that all the work I did, and no success in that area.  (Years later, the light bulb will turn on about how burning calories and eating a large extra cheese pizza with coke every week is very counterproductive in other no-duh areas.)

So, as I’ve mentioned, while reading about Nopal and after taking it for less than a week I came across articles that explained how a liver not properly cleaning toxins contributed to cellulite.  I stopped in my tracks, marched to the bathroom and yanked down my pants.  Like butter, baby!  Another part of the recent chronicles is how I’m fully committed to a thorough detox, via bio-energetic screening. Although I’m trying to halt an annoying disease in its tracks, a significant role for quality of life is to find the root of the disease and reverse the damage that has been done.  Yes, we have the divine ability to clear out disease.  Just because we don’t know how to always do it, doesn’t mean it’s not out there.  Cellulite is the effect, so what is the root?

I started putting it all together and here are the things I’ve been doing in the last three months that whipped my legs into shorts-worthy condition?

1) LYMPHATIC DRAINAGE SUPPLEMENT – In the detox, I’m taking a specific tonic  called Drainage.  The following article clearly denotes that a poor lymphatic drainage, along with bad circulation, can trap the toxins: http://www.cellulite-exercises.com/Cellulite-and-Bad-Diet-Toxins.php

2) NATURAL LYMPHATIC STIMULATION – I haven’t been sweating my tush off at the gym, but I do workouts that specifically stimulate the lymphatic system, circulation, and stretch the connective fibers from all major points : See Lovely Lady Lumps for Classical Stretch. Note: I don’t even do it every day as a healthier person is capable of. (For those who rot in an office chair all week (me!), or sleep in a bed from Hades (also me), your circulation needs a hand.  Exercise and/or massage.

3) DIET – While I’m knee-deep in detoxification I have been forced -gratefully- into an extremely clean and natural diet.  So, while getting rid of the old toxins and not reintroducing new ones, all the yucky muck has been gradually scrubbing it out and not accumulating new junk.  It’s not completely 100% avoidable, but let’s say 90% of my habits have been house-flipped.

What toxin exposure I’ve removed:

  • over the counter and pharmaceutical medications (used extremely sparingly)
  • processed foods, i.e. refined breads and sugars, preservatives
  • artificial additives (including sweeteners like Splenda and Truvia…It contains a form of ethanol…I know!),
  • color dyes
  • most cosmetics and toiletries with strange and unpronounceable names
  • chemical cleaning products
  • unclean waters via kitchen faucet and shower filters
  • drinks: alcohol, coffee, and caffeine

Basically, it’s really hard to get so clean overnight unless you’ve had it with thunder thighs (which like I said, I had come to embrace), or are becoming aware of unknown dangers in recent times, or like me, have absolutely no choice.  It takes dedication, patience, and sometimes, a bit of el cash-o.  It’s better to go gradual if you know you’ll just hang it up in 2 weeks, especially if you got a million things going on.


Additional helping habits undertaken: Drinking close to a gallon of water a day to flush more crap.  Eating vegetables that helps clean toxins.

4) LIVER: The detox, and now the Nopal, are helping me clean out the liver.  Whatever traces are left (and there is some, especially on the right leg which incidentally, the right side of my body has always been extremely stubborn..coincidence?), I’ll be making sure the liver is working at its maximum to cure the inevitable inhaled or ingested toxins that now have hope of being destroyed or detained.

5) HORMONES: the last token I found in my research of how I an serendipitously controlling cellulite.  This one is a hard one for all women living in a toxic world.  Even our facial moisturizer can have chemicals that mimic estrogen and unwittingly create imbalance in us.  The only reason I’m hormonally balanced (or at least closer than I used to be), is mostly discovering what foods and medications were throwing off my adrenal glands (where stress and hormones are managed), and a hormone spray from the holistic medication in the balancing detox protocol.  It doesn’t mean I’m not prone to some mood swings and crying, but let’s just say I don’t throw things at the wall as often.  Thoughts, actions, and mildness are usually stable.

Wrapping-It-Up: It seems the only hereditary thing about cottage cheese is that our mommas’ livers also did not have an optimum metabolism and lymphatic system, not that they doom us to central and localized toxic fats for all of eternity.  It does not mean a lack of health overall, it just means some tweaking could be implemented in our lifestyles.  If we take to listening to our bodies,  it’s basically telling us less french fries and more green beans.  Now that we know where the culprit lies, we can start trying to fix it.  Even thin girls can have dimply legs; and it’s probably the one who can eat burgers and don’t gain a pound.

Those are the secret nuggets I claim to have universal privy to.  But I don’t.  It seems really easy for five simple steps to fix a life-long problem.  My theory is just that it’s not common knowledge and not a lot of people in certain clusters are on the clean diet bandwagon.  It’s pickin up speed I tell you.  Note: for more severe cases, it might not be so easily reversible, according to links included in the post.

Disclaimer:  This is not professional advice and does not intend to impose a change of lifestyle or imply that those who are not following a clean diet are unhealthy.  This is a reach out to those who are looking for theories, methods, and ideas, to try and improve a specific aspect of  their current habits or health regimen.  My intention is to be humbly share my experience, not to be all high-and-mighty because I eat brown rice and organic cereal.   I’m just a schmuck trying to feel better.

Some articles for your enlightenment:

Cellulite and the Connection to The Liver and Lymph System « Essential Oils… more than basic Aromatherapy.

Reduce Cellulite by Reducing Toxins (Oh yes, Celery is mentioned)

Lumps made of fat and toxins (A lovely testament that women have it rougher than men.)


Filed under Indulgence, Picture of Health

Inheriting Aztec Healing Secrets – (the Nopal)

My ancestry traces back to the Aztecs and I always thought one day I would inherit a place on the throne as a Central American princess or get the title to a private  Maya or something; maybe in 2012 where the universe’s consciousness  shifts.  Considering that I went U.S.A. all the way, I strayed from my roots.  Now that I have chronic issues everyday, I’m going back to my roots.  Tortillas, beans, and cactus are saving my life.


When we think of the Aztecs we tend envision a great ephemeral civilization of wild, savage, barbaric, Indians with crazy human rituals.  We know little about them as a thriving people.  What we do know we have picked up on what schoolbooks and movies present to us.  Well, as usual, history has been flubbed and made to be perceived a certain way and the truth is coming out.  This wonderful book 1941 New Revelations of the Americas Before Columbus is providing a developing accurate account of who the natives in this new world were and how advanced they really lived.  Not just South America, but the ones here in North America.  Read some true stories of Pocahontas, John Smith, and Squanto.  Recommended reading.

1491: New Revelations of the Americas Before Columbus

The reason I bring this up is because they, and many other desert dwelling natives, had an understanding of nature and its relationship with humans.  They ate a balanced diet from agricultural farms they rose up, they healed the sick and lived active, intelligent lives.  Many South American countries still practice some of the secrets (secrets to us anyway) and they have been using Nopal for centuries.

The Spanish call it tuna.

Cactus Medicine, Cactus Juice, Cactus Huevos, Cactus Shish-kabob

A large population is getting fed up with pharmaceutical side effects and are delving into ancient healing methods.  Enter this cactus plant, Nopal.  You can’t hit up the internet for a search without some recent boomer marketing operation promoting the desert cactus and it’s “prickly-pear” fruit juice.  However, the real Americans have been using them in their diet for a long time now.  I wasn’t kidding that they eat it with eggs or grill it like a steak.  Sans spikes.

It is ripe with healing benefits.  Loaded with vitamins and minerals.  It’s a natural detoxifier.  It’s a superfood, the buzzword of the year.  Like I’ve mentioned before, America has deviated from attending to the maintenance of important organs such as the liver, spleen, or gallbladder.  We need to keep these functioning at optimum levels to cleanse our body from the toxins we ingest.  Medicines and processed foods are wreaking havoc on our liver, causing us to have multiple mysterious symptoms.  And we think to ourselves, oh we just need a vitamin, I need to sleep more or the next fad supplement, and we’ll get over it.  Unless something tragically breaks down, we have not been trained to infer, “We need to make sure our organs are doing their jobs because this symptom is an indication that something needs our attention.”

The liver is where our toxins are cleaned.  Where there is toxin overload, which could be anything from alcohol, sugar, medications, etc., we begin to feel drowsy, forgetful, foods make us feel heavy, bad breath, muscle soreness, acne or skin breakouts, belly fat, the list goes on.  The liver is overworked and can even swell up from working over time.

And here is why I’m writing about Nopal.  A friend of mine, also chronically ill since her teen years, once had her gallbladder explode and leak  its toxin content into her entire bloodstream.  Imagine having all the by-products and dirty compounds your body stores for elimination floating around in your heart, head, brain, skin. Enough said.  In the hospital, her liver was shutting down from trying to handle the overload.  The doctor was setting her up for a transplant.  A family-friend, Peruan, told her about Nopal.  Prepared it for her.  Forced her to eat the slimy plant.  Three weeks later, the doctor was baffled that her liver was almost at normal functioning again.  No transplant needed.

I’m personally in need of detoxification to reverse my autoimmune from attacking my beloved body parts.  My body is in toxic overload.  I would also say I need to assist my body in further detoxification, not just the currently accumulated junk.   I’m doing a holistic detox, but diet is also a huge factor in short-term and long-term success.  As we speak, I’m also experimenting with America’s indigenous and ancient plant to see if my symptoms get some relief.

But Wait…There’s More!!

I’m sure you want to hear more about the belly fat.  This is an inexpensive, and kind of yucky but effective way, to slim down.  It absorbs sugars and carbohydrates, regulating the glycemic levels when reacting to insulin.  Yup, it is used to control diabetes and deal with excess fats and glucose.  Does it really help?  It’s already helped me in digestive aid and inflammation in that frontal area where all the main organs hang out.  So a fortified si!

So far, less tummy aches, digestive issues, clearer and softer and more vibrant skin, less phlegm/mucus  in throat and sinuses (which needs to be controlled for those of you that suffer this chronically, it means you might have a candida or fungal overgrowth), regularity (I could have made this graphic but I won’t.  However, many with Lupus have this issue.), better metabolism, less tires around my waist.

There is also a little topic called CELLULITE, that I’m careful to say has not been cured by this, buuuutt it has a strong connection to cottage-cheese legs and dimply butts.  Nopal did not get rid of my cellulite, but something in the recent months has smoothed out my legs and thighs like a baby’s bottom.  It happened while I wasn’t looking.  Hell, I wasn’t even doing lunges.  Last thing I cared about was sporting short shorts if I could barely tolerate my aching knees.   An article about Nopal brought out an interesting relation between cellulite and that thing I’m not telling you about just yet.  This is how I’ll keep you coming back to my site.  CLIFFHANGER!!!

In a few posts, I will talk about how this stuff comes to be a torment to most women and how it can go away.  I used to think it was impossible and solely genetic.  There is hope!  For now, start looking up your nearing Latin or Mexican supermarket.

Painless Ways to Eat a Cactus

Licuado de Nopal - If you're also a Mexican food lover, check this delicious website out. From the Muy Bueno Cookbook

  • The link above shows an easy and painless way to make a smoothie and shares a quickie account about the author’s friend with beautiful skin and thin frame.
  • The way I started taking this before I researched information is very raw and caveman like. I just scrape off the plant’s defensive spines with a paring knife…carefully, cut out the edged lining, drop in the magic bullet, and started taking 2 tablespoons 3 times a day. My mom actually told me this is how a Spanish friend of her takes it, one who has nursed herself to health naturally.
  • The easiest way is to buy it in pill, powder, or juice form. To get the full benefits I prefer the plant in its natural state.

The taste is bitter and strong, not gross.  It’s a powerful vegetable like taste; like an onion trying to overthrow all the other veggies.  The texture is horrible.  Gooey and slimy like oysters.  But it’s over in 2 seconds.  I haven’t tried the recipe above but something tells me that it is more pleasant than my method.  I thought I would never be able to swallow it down, but I’m not scared anymore.

Up to date, there is no better superfood that I have found, as strange and alien as it might be, it’s worth expanding our minds and letting another culture get their say in modern times.  Let’s use it.

General Info about Nopal and Prickly Pear:




http://www.desertbloom.net/Benefits.aspx (The best link if you only choose one)

http://www.desertbloom.net/whatis.aspx Testimonials


Filed under Foodsies, Housewifing, Loopy Lupus, Picture of Health, Under the Weather